One of those days.

Today was one of those days.
You know the kind.
And I think it's leading up to one of those weeks.
The kind that just...
suck.

I spent the weekend studying. Pretty much... the whole weekend. And I had spent the week before doing the same. Because I knew that this week was going to be miserable. But I also knew I had to do good on this test.

I didn't.

I failed... And I don't fail.

So I called my mom when I walked out of the classroom. She said "hey baby! How'd you do?" All cheery even at 8:30 in the morning. And I started bawling like a baby walking to my dorm.
And then my dad called. He told me how it's okay. How great I do in school. How this doesn't even matter. How I'm so much smarter than him. (bull crap). How I just need to take a moment to relax, and then move on to the next thing.
I informed him how it won't matter how much time I spend studying on my next test, I'm still gonna fail at it, and started crying harder.

I fell asleep, set my alarm for PM instead of AM and ended up sleeping for 4 hours.

Slept through my only open lab for my test on Friday.

Practiced on a girl a couple rooms down.

Started studying.

Got on facebook to find the girl I'll be doing my test on for Friday. Saw that I had been added to a facebook group for the mission trip I'm going on next summer. It had a little "about me" thing they wanted us to do, so I did it real fast. The last question? What's your favorite Bible verse. Without thinking, I typed mine down. It wasn't till I was rereading my post to check for mistakes that the verse actually hit me.

James 1:2-4: " Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

I was definitely finding no joy in this. I was pissed. I had already emailed the teacher and am meeting with her tomorrow... spent all my time studying already...

I don't feel mature. But maybe that's because I'm not finding joy. I shouldn't let this hit me this hard. It's only school, and I need to remember that though it is important, it is in no way everything. It's just one little part of my life. And if God wants to teach me lessons through this, I should be able to learn from them the same as anywhere else.

And once this week is over, I'll have Thanksgiving. And I'll be able to genuinely thank God for getting me through this week without going pyscho.